November 22, 2022

let's see how much of a habit i can make out of...journaling basically lmao. might be decent for my mental health, might not!

1. my brain is not loving the Chemical Imbalance™ that's resulted from my meds getting screwed up. i still have no idea how i might have lost the bottle. i got the refill...put it in my purse...and then it was just gone by the time i got home. zero fucking clue where it went, and i had no luck finding it no matter how much i searched. i've been denied a sooner refill twice by my doctor lmao. i didn't think that this would hit my brain too bad (it wasn't my ssri thankfully), but BOY AM I FEELING IT NOW MR. KRABS. my ocd is definitely worse now.
2. i keep wanting to social...and then immediately feeling overwhelmed when i do. i really need my other med back in my system because i am not coping well with intrusive thoughts otherwise.
3. twitter is...somehow now even stressful for me, even on desktop where i use a script to remove all the trending and annoying things. just knowing bigots are being reinstated by apartheid clyde kind of sucks. i don't like uncertainty either, so it would be great if the site could either straighten our or just die.
4. i'm probably just going to go to bed once i get home from work again. make myself walk the dog and take a shower, then crawl into bed.

Media BS

1. i watched a story compilation of halo reach on the rec of a friend. i've never played a halo game really--the most was some of i think halo 2's multiplayer at my cousins' house when i was a lot younger? the framing impressively mimicked war films, and that you first come into the game looking out through noble six's visor before the camera draws back to a 3rd-person pov and then it ends watching through six's cracked and abandoned helmet as he fights to his final moments...halo can hit some really solid emotional beats.
2. been reading through more of dragalia lost's main story campaign. probably about a chapter or so away from being halfway through it all. the localization really impressives me in how nicely and distinctly the dialogue is. it has a lot of personality despite the characterizations being relatively limited (in the main story at least. i don't know how much various side characters are expanded in other game material). the incest is so real. euden is my little incest harem protagonist...
3. i watched all of house of the dragon's first season. mostly as background noise, tbh. i didn't expect too much out of it, and i'm admittedly guaraded against investing myself in it because of how hard game of thrones burned me. the production is lovely from the visuals to the direction to the acting. really well done on that aspect! the writing...is more of a mixed bag. i understand that the show was trying to give the required backstory so that it could hit the "historical" events it wanted to show, but fucking woof at that pacing. inconsistent as all hell. i mostly just cared about alicent, alicent, and alicent. she's fantastic and the most cohesive character across the show thus far. she is probably going to end up on my character page lmao.