May 20, 2024

long time no blog......................part the third!!!

haha, oh boy. i have a bad habit of falling into a slump on this stuff, huh? this year was particularly bad for me towards the start. not to get too deep into politics (and i discuss my mental state a bit more in my rambling here, toward the bottom), but i'm american. the trump reelection did not do good things for my mental health or my view on humanity as a whole. it took me some time before i crawled my way out of that despair hole. i've been really happy just doing small tweaks or updates lately on the site, though! i always feel like i have too many time-hungry hobbies, so just putting a bit of time into it every few days is possibly a good way to keep up on it?

idk i'm just sort of rambling.

you really start to understand why adults become so cynical and disbelieving of anything changing as you personally get older. it's hard to maintain a belief in people being more good than bad. it still feels so silly to say, but playing enderal this year did so much for my mental health. (again, see here lol.) there's always a chance that next time things will be better, and that's something i need to believe to just fall over depressed, haha.

i'm going to keep trying my best and continuing even when the despair does win.

Media BS

1. an indie game i have been waiting well over a year to release, demonschool, finally dropped yesterday! i had it all downloaded and ready to play, but i ended up spending my evening differently. i saw a clip of a hentai anime with a bad english dub, and i was so immediately determined to know the truth behind this alleged grandpa deathfuck!
2. so i spent an hour before bed watching a bad hentai anime called mamahaha (or the duchess of busty mounds). i had to go through so many hentai sites before i could find the dub. they kept only having subs, completely misunderstanding that my motivation to watch this cheaply animated porn was not for said busty mounds but for the quality english dub. it was two episodes, and god...there is something so special about a consistently entertaining bad english hentai dub... it turns out that the grandpa deathfuck was a voluntary choice between the mc's stepmom (she of busty mounds) and the mc's grandpa. grandpa was already on his way out and wanted to exhaust himself via horny. what really shocked me, though, was that the stepmom convinced the mc to have grandpa's dick cast in bronze, so she could keep it...and then she started talking about doing the same to the mc while recycling other dirty talk she'd used with grandpa. it culminated in the reveal that she seems to have been poisoning and bronzing the dicks of past lovers! somehow, this mid hentai anime had a genuine plot twist that recontextualized the rest of the story and slightly elevated it.
3. i am on the last heaven official's blessing novel! i'll miss grandpa and his husband, but i'm so fucking ready to be done with this translator's work. my friend emily has promised me that scum villain reads much nicer.